Look What I Made!

It's hard to fully discribe the anger I feel when I am learning something new. Aparently I've decided that I should do it correctly, if not perfectly, the first time and require no learning curve. This applies to everything in life such as learning to drive, learning another language, learning to tolerate people learning customer service, and finally, crocheting. I've breifly dabbled in knitting in the past but never created more then a mile long scarf that was uncomfortable, poorly constructed, and in all honesty, totally hidious. Though knitting was fun I always dreamed of making peices with flowers and patterns that I'd only seen been done by crochet. So I picked up a hook and took at it. This wasn't my frist attempt at learning how to crochet. I've tried at least three times before, and all attempts ended in tears, anger, and the destorying of my failed work while thinking " Ha! take that stupid crocheting! I'll teach you to make a fool of me!" I felt victorious in the moment but every so often inspiration strikes to try again just like recently. With this attempt I took to the internet. I have no one living near me that knows how to crochet to teach me, and books aren't a good tool for me as I can't really follow along, but with youtube and the power of the internet I was able to find a great video to walk me though the process from my first chain to to a finished 20x20 square piece.

When I first sat down to begin my learning I was quickly confused when trying to mimic hand movements. What I didn't understand is why I was told to hold the crochet hook in my right hand, even if I was a lefty. Which I am! Immediately I was suspicious of her righty propaganda. But I followed along to the best of my ability. The goings were tough. Feeling as if I was suffering from hand dyslexia, (is that a thing?P.S. I originally spelt dyslexia wrong. HAHA) I couldn't control my hands and their positions, let alone what stitch I was making a poor attempt at creating. Filled with lefty pride I switched hands and made a second attempt from the start. To say that it was ten times easier would be a gross understatement. It was more like a million bisquillion times easier. I don't know where the woman in this video got her idea that there was no difference between lefty and righty but she is seriously mistaken. With my new found power of lefty I continued on. I quickly lost count of my rows and couldn't seem to keep track of them at all regardless of how hard I tried. It was simply too easy for my mind to wander and start thinking about something. While my eyes where focusing on my hands, my brain was thinking of every single ridiculous thought it could, just to be sure it would loose track of my rows and stitches. I think this is a reoccurring problem in my life, this lack of concentration, but I'll continue to choose to ignore it and the fact that this presents a huge problem to my crocheting future.

I thought I was getting the hang of the technique of the single stitch. Zooming through row after row my work became so fun, each row seemed to be shorter and shorter. Wait a second is rows ARE shorter and shorter. Somehow I began dropping stitches and what was supposed to be a 20x20 square turned into a large 16bit bell. Needless to say I was disappointed. But not disappointed enough to not give it another shot. Take two, and I was much more confident in myself, rows 1-6 all seemed to be in order and not shrinking in the slightest. But soon the inevitable occurs and my piece slowly begins to morph into a this time, mutated bell. And I become defeated. As defeated as I was, I really had the dream in me to one day make a beautiful piece that I could wear and love it knowing I had made it. So I go back to my video and scrutinize every little detail. And what do I find? I had been doing at least two things wrong! Two super important things! So, third time bering a charm, I try again. And you know what? I did it! I made a 20x20 square! It's not perfect, and its not anything special, but boy am I proud of it. In fact, I was so proud and pleased that I went ahead and made another! Check out the end result!




It wasn't easy, and I still have a lot of learning ahead of me, but I'm glad I took this first step in learning and didn't give up. I really encourage anyone curious about crocheting or just looking to create anything at all to do what I do and learn at least the basics of this skill. It has been unbelievably rewarding and of course fun. Now, just to figure out what to do with these silly things.